Romance » You are responsible for your own happiness by: Tony4mega(m) .:. Fri, 25 Oct, 2019 - 03:55:26:pm GMT

It is definitely notot my partner's job to make me happy. It's my job to make me happy. Of course it's easy to feel good when my partner is acting in a way that I want -but needing them to be a certain way in order for me to feel good -that's bondage. Thinking that they're always going to be in a good mood and directing their affectionate attention towards me - while that may be possible during the initial stage of a relationship, is impossible to sustain long-term. I'm responsible for my happiness. My partner is responsible for her happiness. We deliberately focus on things to feel good in our lives and for things to appreciate in one another.

If you're looking for someone to complete you -or vice versa-you're looking in the wrong direction for the lasting happiness, wholeness, and fulfillment that you truly seek. Wouldn't it be better if you could find a way to feel how you want to feel regardless of what you're partner is saying or doing?

This advice transformed every relationship in my life - not just the romantic ones. Before I knew these things, I was unintentionally holding my partner responsible for my happiness. When I learned that I'm responsible for my own happiness and when I learned how to consistently align with it, my entire world transformed. I now have the freedom to choose if and when I spend time with someone else, and I deliberately choose to spend time with others who get this, too. My relationships are more meaningful, more loving, more free, and most importantly - more fun! And my overall happiness continues to grow, too, regardless of whether I'm in a relationship or not.



**Let love lead**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Obinnaoguji(m) .:. Mon, 04 Nov, 2019 - 10:22:48:am GMT

Over the years, this is one thing most people fail to understand. You owe yourself the duty to be happy. Nobody is responsible for that. This is the fact. You are as happy as you make yourself to.


What are you bringing to the table? Your happiness when collide with that of your partner's, produces the best result.

Learn to own your journey. Here are some tips I will recommend
1. Embrace personal development. It helps to own your growth. Develop the habit of developing all aspect of your life it helps to boost your self esteem.

2. Have some goals. If you don't have any, set some goals. Career, family, economical, mental and business goals help you with something that pulls you towards the future. Actualising your goals make you happy when you celebrate your little wins that matter.

3. Enjoy your company. Whenever you're alone and you're not enjoying the company, something is wrong. Learn to find and soak yourself in the things that interest you. Do you like video game? Buy a set of it. Are you a football fan? Go out and enjoy the game.

4. Deal with toxic people. This doesn't need much emphasis. When people are playing with your self esteem and thus bringing you down, why are you still with them? Atop pleasing people at the detriment of your happiness.

5. Kill your inferiority complex. Most times people are genuinely good to you but prone to mistakes. The way you view their mistake matters. Don't allow your inferiority complex complicate your relationships.

**obysuccess**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Princess(f) .:. Tue, 16 Jun, 2020 - 04:33:25:pm GMT

It is important to for one to know that his or her happiness is solely dependent on no one. We are to be responsible for our happiness which I'm sure comes from the choices we makeor decisions we take.


It is also quite important to note that we could be around some people who have this ability to share their happiness with others, by saying or doing some things. Depending on this people to fill in your gap (ie. The job of you making yourself happy) is more like willingly enslaving oneself (which is very dangerous) because your mood would be depending on how they make you feel.

It would be better if a lot of people knew this, because a lot have been drawn into the arms of depression, thoughts of self harm fill their hearts as a result of how their so ccalled source of happiness has treated them.
It is your responsibility to make yourself happy!

**Pwincy**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Glamour(f) .:. Tue, 23 Jun, 2020 - 03:50:36:am GMT

This one is strong, smiles. All what you have written is the truth nobody can make you happy apart from yourself. Don't stress people out with your baggage. Happiness comes from within, yes your partner making you happy is priceless it's something people look forward to in relationships but that a plus to your own self generated happiness. Don't always wait for your partner to make you happy, or do not use them as an happiness machine.funny enough people do it couple do it , you are sad and yes you tell your partner not because you want her to know but for her to cheer you up which is nice but it gets to a point it becomes selfish. For example you decided invest in something without discussing it with your partner and he or she doesn't know until you found out that you were scammed and you go crying to your partner. I feel you just want to suck out the happiness in them like you made a move without them knowing that is painful already maybe u would have had a prayer warrior backing your investment and now it didn't work out you come to the partner to lament so that you can hearing empowering words that would lightening your own mood forget that you are also dropping the sad words and emotions because no one loves to see their loved ones sad and if you don't get to hear the nice words the saying you are mean, you lack empathy and so on comes out from your mouth. Nobody can give you the happiness you think you deserve it all starts from you.
**God's favorite**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Dynameak(f) .:. Tue, 23 Jun, 2020 - 11:14:49:am GMT

DEVELOP THE HAPPY HABIT

Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding. Proverbs 3:13

Happiness is a choice and a habit that you can develop. Abraham Lincoln - People are as happy as they make up their mind to be. In the world, you should be your number one go to person for happiness. Ethel Barrymore - You grow up the day you have the first real laugh at yourself. Simply put, learn to enjoy your own company because living starts with you, then an extension to other lives.

Your beliefs can greatly affect your level of happiness so do well to change your mind and start to believe things that will increase your happiness. Consciously make a decision not to base your happiness on human, objects or future events because none of those guarantee happiness. True happiness comes from knowing the Lord and happiness becomes intense with consistent fellowship with the Lord.

Groucho Marx said "Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have a power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday I dead, tomorrow hasn't arrives yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it." Psalms 118:24 This is the day that the Lord has made let us rejoice and be glad in it. If you do not decide daily to be happy, there will always be something to poison your happiness.

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a present so learn to enjoy everyday ordinary life because that's what most of life is about.

**Life is a race but with God's element of grace it'll be worth while to explore His goodness. **


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Bookie(f) .:. Wed, 01 Jul, 2020 - 06:50:55:pm GMT

The world's concept of happiness is having what we want. The world will tell you that a flashier car, a sexier clothe or any number of items that are better, faster or easier to use than what we already have. We watch the television and read the newspaper, and we become eager to get all the latest fashions. We are not really happy until we get what we want.

God's concept of happiness is summed up in the proverb "happy is the man who wants what he has." As long as we focus on what we don't have, we will never be happy. But when we begin to appreciate what we already have, we will be happy all our lives.
No wonder the Bible repeatedly commands us to be thankful. 1thess 5: 18 says " give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God".

If you really want to be happy, learn to be thankful for what you have , not greedy for what you don't have. This is the key to a lifetime happiness.

**Perfect**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Dynameak(f) .:. Fri, 10 Jul, 2020 - 12:27:49:pm GMT

If you're waiting on your partner for happiness then you are embarking on an endless journey because nobody is responsible for your happiness. You are the major actor in your life, the script is in your hand so you are to write your way to happy road. People should be responsible for their happiness respectively. Happiness that is personally generated stays through time than getting reasons to be happy externally. Being at peace with oneself is key to being happy because you will have reasonable control of the things that you do and that can fan up desire for success with adequate input.

It's nice for one party to make the other happy but it's unwise to depend on one's partner for happiness because your partner can't satisfy you with happiness a hundred percent.

**Life is a race but with God's element of grace it'll be worth while to explore His goodness. **


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Victoria(f) .:. Tue, 14 Jul, 2020 - 11:07:33:pm GMT

You're responsible for your own happiness. Has anyone ever told you otherwise? Has anyone ever told you that he or she is the sole reason for your happiness? I am pleased and honoured to announce to you that that is nothing but a cooked up lie from the pit of hell. No one, I mean no one, not your parents, not your siblings or other family members, not your best friend, not your husband and not your children. They may be a part of the reasons you're happy but the ultimate happiness is the one that springs up from deep within you, the one you derive from yourself.
No one can make you happy the way you can make yourself happy. I know it sounds like what people say everyday and you've gotten so used to it, it now seems like an anthem you sing but pay no real attention to. Now, I want you to think about it and wonder how really you own your joy and happiness.
Don't let anyone treat you like a puppet, pulling your strings as they please, making you alternate between highs and lows and happiness and sadness. Even in the midst of bad things or terrible situations, if you choose to find happiness then it's possible.
Make sure you equip yourself with all you need to make yourself happy. You've got to have everything at your disposal.
Find what makes you happy and hold onto it. That thing that you do that had never failed to put a smile on your face, you need to make sure you continue doing it, no matter how weird it may seem and no matter what people say.
For me, I love Kdramas and K-pop as a whole so when I feel like I'm about to have a bout of sadness, I submerge myself if you watching drama or listening to music. That's my happy place and it has never failed me. People say it's weird but it will never change my opinion.
You own your happiness, okay?

**Live, love and heal...**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: ChukwukaEmmanuel(m) .:. Mon, 20 Jul, 2020 - 01:09:41:pm GMT

This is what people fail to understand. Most things happen to people because they permit them to happen whether consciously or unconsciously. You what I'm trying to drive at here is the mystery in the power if will, mindset. If your joy and happiness lies in material stuffs, it may shock you to know that at one point or the other you will experience heartbreaks. But if you can come to the understanding that all these can be controlled upstairs" mentally", it would be a lot easier for you if hazards happen cause you would be able to control your emotions.


Some people, when probably they are lacking in something it tends to affect their happiness thereby also affecting other aspects of their lives. It may be financial hardship, if you are able to see yourself as rich in your mind, it affects your outward look. That way you don't really act according to your situation but the way you want and that mindset helps propel you to achieving it physically.

Its all in the mindset, hope for positivity and always stay positive and positivity will cone trailing down your path. You should be able to outline the things that matter most to you in your life. I mean the basic things of worth and value. When bad things happen, you can decide to stay happy instead of being weighed down by the situation. If we can come to the conclusion that no situation is greater than us, then we should be able to control the outcome of our emotions and your ability to master this alone brings some level of happiness and reduces regrets.

Also we should know that our happiness depends on us and bit on others cause humans by nature are not perfect creations and at one point or the other can disappoint. Your ability to understand this and control your reaction towards this helps in the understanding that our happiness is basically under our own power. Not with anyone or anything but with us. Tho these things can come with happiness and joy at one point or the other, it is still our responsibility to remain joyful and happy even when they are not there.

**Fanzy**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Vickybrown(m) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 10:57:18:am GMT

Oftentimes you give others the opportunity to create your
happiness, and many times they fail to create it the way you
want it. Why? Because only one person can be in charge of
your joy, of your bliss, and that's you. So even your parent,
your child, your spouse-they do not have the control to
create your happiness. They simply have the opportunity to
share in your happiness. Your joy lies within you.
All your joy is on the frequency of love-the highest and the most
powerful frequency of all. You can't hold love in your hand. You
can only feel it in your heart. It is a state of being. You can see evidence of love being expressed through people, but love is a feeling,
and you are the only one that can radiate and emit that feeling of
love.

**Just me**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Nagiano(m) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 01:29:50:pm GMT

Like the topic says, you are responsible for your own happiness and I completely agree with you. You also made mention of you not putting your happiness in the hands of your partner. This last point I don't completely agree with you.

One thing about our feelings or emotions is that you can't completely have full control over. You can practice self control but it can never be hundred percent.
You saying you are in a relationship with a partner that you genuinely love and you both share the same goals and now your happiness won't be dependent on her, for me that's pretence and not completely true.
If you have a partner that you are both planning for the future together and you both share common goals, my brother that happiness that you think you have full control over will fall your hand the day she breaks your heart or disappoints you.
Sometimes we tend to say things just to feel good but deep down we know that we are only pretending.
Thank you.

**Man United for Life**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Nagiano(m) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 01:42:20:pm GMT


@Dynameak:

I have gone through some of the comments and I'm seeing statements like it's only you that can make yourself happy which is completely true. I saw statements like your partner, parents, siblings and friends can only be part of your happiness which is also true.
But why do we feel sad when we go true heartbreaks, disappointments etc from these people I earlier mentioned.
For instance, if your partner breaks up with you why is it that everything for for some time until you are ready to move. If your family members disappoints you, why do we feel so sad and sometimes when we set eyes on them, our day is ruined.
Individually, we might be the only ones to make ourselves happy but it doesn't mean our happiness is not dependent on some factors.
I want to put it to all of you that if they sack everyone from work, where will you even find that strength to make yourself happy.
Sometimes we need an external factor to be able to harness our happiness.

**Man United for Life**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Abbey(m) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 05:10:16:pm GMT


Yes you are responsible for your own happiness,
Happiness is something free from God if you work towards it. Happiness is good in a person life it even make your life to be more meaningful, happiness would add more days to your days on earth , happiness would bring joy into your heart.
Don think about the situation around you do not think about the past experience you had, do not think about how the country is, free your mind from any worries, free your heart from any thing distoping you. Try and be happy with your family and friends if you are happy then you you will have a good life after .
Some times happiness gives you a long life and good health , I you fail don't worry try more and put more effort failure is not the end of the life , if someone else happiness is your happiness that is love .
I love you all be happy , one again be happy

**Abiodun**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Mima(f) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 05:11:35:pm GMT

Everybody want to be happy nobody want to be sad. Happiness is an individual choice, either you make yourself happy or sad. Even the Bible says true happiness is when you know God because the joy of the Lord is your strength.

The people in your life will either increase you, decrease you or neutralize you that is why you need to choose the kind of people you surround yourself with. Check your relationship.
Wrong association will steal your joy.
Many people have shorten their lives by committing suicide because of what people say or think about them. Whether you are fat, slim, rich or poor, love yourself and keep yourself happy. Anybody that is not making you happy, let them go. Don't allow what is happening around you steal your joy.

It is necessary to make yourself happy to remain healthy .

You have every to be keep yourself happy, life is short. That you are alive is something to be grateful to God for.

For instance, the physically challenged (blind, deaf, dumb, handicapped etc) still move on with their lives despite their challenges talk more of us who are hale and hearty we still complain of one thing or the other. We should always appreciate God for creating us in a unique way.

Finally, try to appreciate the little effort you put in somethings, don't compare yourself with people just improve. You are responsible for your own happiness. Always remember that.

**Just me**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Ninoevans(m) .:. Wed, 29 Jul, 2020 - 05:31:34:pm GMT

well said, man is truly the architect of his happiness, for no one can make him happy except he chooses to. They say, you can force a horse to the stream but you cannot force it to drink water.

One of the ways of making yourself happy, is for you to have self-love and stop comparing yourself with other people. You are created in a dynamic way and your beauty will be appreciated by the right people. It is not only buy the physical appearance, the value and impact you make also brings out the beauty in you.

Be contented with what you have, live within your means and avoid unnecessary competition with friend and relatives. Focus on working hard to get what you desire the right way and make sure you celebrate your little wins

**Creativity lies in the imagination of man**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Jegiyasa(f) .:. Thu, 30 Jul, 2020 - 04:50:08:pm GMT


@obinnaoguji:yeah ,enjoying the things you do is also part of self happiness ,you say positive things about yourself also .
**Kolo**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Flat(m) .:. Thu, 30 Jul, 2020 - 10:18:50:pm GMT

Hmmm! Happiness the truth is that, you should make yourself happy which is the best but you alone can't be the source of your happiness. The people that surrounds you also contribute to your happiness such as your siblings, your parents, your friends, and your immediate environment. This is the reason why you feel sad and unhappy if anything bad happens to any of this people. What is happiness? Happiness is that feeling that comes over you when you know life is good and you can't help but smile, it is the opposite of sadness. Happiness is a sense of well-being, joy, or contentment. When people are successful, or safe, or lucky, they feel happiness. The "pursuit of happiness" is something this country is based on, and different people feel happiness for different reasons. Whenever doing something causes happiness, people usually want to do more of it. No, one ever complained about feeling too much happiness.
The truth is if you know your happiness should be your sole responsibility then you won't bother going into any form of relationship. You having a relationship not necessarily a love relationship, in as much as you share a bond with your family, that alone contribute to your happiness. Even aside that, God also contribute to our happiness in a very good way. But what we should place focus on is not to allow those that contribute to our happiness weigh us down for long. For instance now, if your parent are having misunderstanding in which you are aware of this, will you still be happy, if your siblings are facing some challenges and it's hitting them up, will you be happy, if your girlfriend or finance broke your heart into pieces, will you still be happy.
So, a lot of factors contribute to our happiness but we have the right and power to determine what makes us happy.


**--**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Lana(f) .:. Sat, 01 Aug, 2020 - 03:31:38:am GMT

You are responsible for your own happiness and not your partner. You shouldn't depend on anyone to make you happy not even your partner. Your happiness should come from you not anyone or anything else. I remember when my mood was hinged on that of mood of my partner. If he was in a good mood and treated me well, I was happy but if he was in a bad mood and treated me otherwise, I would feel terrible and unhappy. That was very exhausting and exasperating. I made my partner dictate my happiness. I didn't realize that you would only continue to lose yourself and feel miserable as long as your happiness depends on someone. Even when your partner isn't acting well. That shouldn't make you unhappy or sad. There are other things in your life other than you partner that can make you happy. What if suddenly, you partner decides to end things with you and you have decided to make your partner responsible for your happiness, you could through an emotional breakdown or even depression. I think that those who commit suicide because their partner jilted them hinge their happiness on their partner, so when they leave, they feel there is nothing good that can happen in their lives. Human have flaws and will disappoint you. So, don't depend on them because they are fickle minded and can change at any time. Your happiness should come from yourself and your family because your family cannot just wake up and decide they don't love you anymore or they don't want to be with you anymore. You cannot also wake up one day and decide that you don't love yourself anymore or you want to break up with yourself. Some people derive joy from their job. However, the main point is that never hinge your happiness on someone else.


**Love yourself...**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: ObakaEmmanuel(m) .:. Sun, 16 Aug, 2020 - 05:13:10:pm GMT

A happy relationship starts with two happy individuals. And even though happiness increases when you share it, your partner is not responsible for your happiness.You are the only person who can please you in the long run. At first, that might sound scary, but actually it's liberating. No one but you can make you happy.Instead of fixing your partner or your relationship, start investing in yourself. Do things that make you feel alive and work on your self-confidence.All these measures will ensure an increase in your self-worth and help you to detach your happiness from your partner, believe in yourself, and bring more joy into your relationship.
**Obakaemmanuel**


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Dynameak(f) .:. Mon, 31 Aug, 2020 - 07:52:27:pm GMT


@nagiano:Truly as humans we need external contribution to our happiness but we shouldn't rely on the external because anyone can disappoint at any time. I will still maintain that we all become our own source of happiness because stormy days can arise even as we do not pray for them to come our way but like they say life happens but if the happenings of life meet with our preparedness to be happy no matter what comes our way then we will go through the not so good times with ease.

Smiles

If a person should loose a job, it will affect the person but choosing to be happy can be the ticket to get into better opportunities in life, remember that sadness blindfolds man from seeing the opportunities that are available. Good things come faster to those who are happy.

**Life is a race but with God's element of grace it'll be worth while to explore His goodness. **


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   Re: You are responsible for your own happiness by: Omotayodavid(m) .:. Mon, 07 Sep, 2020 - 10:08:32:pm GMT

As often quoted "happiness is free". Happiness is a strong feeling controlled by the outcome of an action or event,happiness is mostly dependent on the circumstances that surrounds a person at a given time. Happiness can be influenced, take for instance you lose a very close friend in an accident, such a person happiness has been tampered with at that point in time, now getting out of that sad and difficult moment now depends on how long the person reacts and shakes it off and not keep getting drowned in such thoughts, at that point in time that is when getting back up comes in which is trying to look for ways to get distracted and find happiness once again. Such a person will keep striving and fighting hard to surround himself /herself with things that would revitalise their thoughts which will in turn generates happiness. My take on this is that we are definitely responsible for our happiness.
**Caringheart**


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