Family/Parenting » MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Osaroju(m) .:. Fri, 28 May, 2021 - 08:41:43:pm GMT
Let's see God's purpose for every family, especially the family of believers
"Didn't the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart remain loyal to the wife of your youth." - Malachi 2:15
When you forsake your family responsibilities because of God's "call upon your life", you have also failed God because you were primarily called for your family too. By this I mean your own immediate family, your wife, husband, kids and the entire household.
It is the careless overlook of the family that has made a lot of Pastors the worst parents. Growing up, I came across a lot of Pastors' kids.
So, I came across pastors' kids and one thing was always consistent in my experience of them, they are mostly wayward and the direct opposite of what their parents represented. We know that the family of believers especially ministers of the gospel are serious targets for the devil and this is why we must never joke with our families.
Growing up, I realized that what most of them lacked was proper parenting. They had parents who were powerful on the pulpit and in the streets but very powerless at home. Many of these Pastors command authority outside but has little or none at home.
Ministry also starts with the family. Let's see how the New Testament addresses this profound truth
"So a church leader must be a man whose life is above reproach. He must be faithful to his wife. He must exercise self-control, live wisely, and have a good reputation. He must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must be able to teach. He must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him." - 1 Timothy 3:2,4
A summation of the above would simply mean that a man fit for ministry must be a man who is strictly family-oriented. It must be a man whose faithfulness and accountability to his wife is profound!
A man who has failed in managing his home will possibly not be able to manage others so well. A lot of times, when God wants to do something great in a generation, he begins with a family from ages past. For example, God had destined that Israel would be the nation through which the Earth would receive Jesus but he didn't just start out with Israel, he started with Abraham.
If Abraham had failed his family, he would have also failed God. It is God's desire that we raise godly seeds for him, it is his desire that through the blessings of multiplication which he has given to man, we can multiply worshippers!
When ministers of the gospel do not raise godly seeds or build a family that glorifies God, they are rather bringing mockery to the name of God. Being sound in doctrine does not replace the need to gain mastery in the skill of parenting, it doesn't replace the need to also spend time with your family.
As much as you teach the word, as much as you pray and fly from one conference to another, as much as you spend quiet time with God, as much as lock-up yourself to study or travel to the mountain to meditate, also remember that your family is your primary responsibility!
Not in any place in the Bible are we asked to ignore our families. Many believers cover their inadequacies with lots of Bible passages, they want to blame God for their inability to take care of their families, they use ministry as an excuse to exempt themselves from their responsibilities but we see from the Bible that a supposed minister of the gospel who has failed in his family responsibilities lacks qualification to pastor others.
One of the most mistaken places in the Bible is where Jesus said
If you love your father or mother more than you love me, you are not worthy of being mine or if you love your son or daughter more than me, you are not worthy of being mine." - Matthew 10:37
God designed human to be socially responsible in the manner that we can be emotionally attached to each other and we should not confuse this kind of love with the love for God. In fact, the Bible makes it clear that our love for others shows our love for God which means we can't truly love God and never love others.
By that strong statement which Jesus made, he was emphasising that we must love God above every other thing but the love for God does not rob off the love for others. Let's see what Jesus said somewhere else
"‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.' This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘you shall love your neighbour as yourself' Matthew 22:37-39
While the love for God comes first, the love for others is likened to it. Jesus said, "the second is like it".
The love for Jesus is not characterised by emotions but by obedience. When Jesus said we should love him more than anyone else, he was simply saying "make me the priority, obey me". The Bible affirms this
"For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments and His commandments are not burdensome." - 1 John 5:3
Jesus shows us the ultimate way to love him in his conversation with Peter
"So when they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon, son of John, do you love Me more than these?” He said to Him, Yes, Lord You know that I love You.” He said to him, Tend My lambs.” - John 21:15
Loving Jesus more than our spouse and children don't mean being less emotionally attached to them, it doesn't mean forsaking them and not giving them the time they deserve, it doesn't mean being more committed to Church activities and being less committed to them.
However, loving Jesus more also means that no matter the love we have for our spouse and children, they can not convince us to give up on that which Jesus has called us to do.
**Don't be a good student and a bad teacher.**
Re: MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Wonders(f) .:. Mon, 31 May, 2021 - 08:51:01:am GMT
Well I happen to be the daughter of man called a pastor. My story is quite different from the aspect you mentioned and that is why am sharing it here because it is not something I like to remember even though I can't change a thing about it.
Yes! My father is pastor! Before I was born, everyone says he was a pastor in New Testament church. He was the one pastoring the new testament church in kwara state, jebba. and when I was born, he told me himself that I was the one that handed him the pen to write his resignation letter as a pastor in new testament church and start his own ministry.
I will not like to go into details of how his own ministry went and is today but what I want to share is that in the eyes of every member and everyone who knows him to be a pastor outside his home, he is a perfect and the best man ever but in reality the reverse is the case. It will be very unkind of me to call him a beast but he was exactly the opposite of what he portrays outside.
This is really very painful! I hate seeing my dad preach! I hate it when they call me pastor's child. See if my dad wants to lie, he will do it without bating an eye. I really don't want to go into details but all I can is that my father was the exact opposite of what he preaches and what the bible commands him to be and yet almost everyone bow at his feet. They reverence him, it was really disgusting to me but I was helpless.
Only few children of all these ministers really enjoyed being ministers children, for most of us, if we have our way, we will expose our so called pastor's parent out to the public and disown them forever.
Up till now, I still have phobia relating to all these young guys of my age that will be behaving like some upcoming pastors. I just pray this generation ministers will be different and will portray themselves the way God wants them to be everywhere and with everyone. Amen!.
**Wonders**
Re: MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Oluwatomisin(f) .:. Sat, 12 Nov, 2022 - 10:47:39:am GMT
Ministry and family are broad topics that need a lot of attention. I am not a pastor child so I might not know the pain some pastor children went through but judging from the pastor children around me all I can say is that there is a lot of work for pastors and their wives to do in their families.
I don't like the way many people portray themselves to people outside as being good and holy people but the people around them can't term them to be perfect. Many pastors are not what other people outside think they are because their wives and children are going through a lot. Although you will see some that are good to their wife and children but very mean to their immediate family.
I would like to center my write-up on the upcoming pastors; It is very important to know that your family is your first ministry. If at all you will win any soul into the kingdom let it start from your family. I remember there was a time God lay teenagers' ministry into my heart and I was so eager to start but to my greatest surprise, the Lord asked me to start by training my siblings first. Charity begins at home!
**Always put God first **
Re: MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Rachael(f) .:. Wed, 23 Nov, 2022 - 04:13:35:pm GMT
We serve a God of principles. A God that has a well-articulated plan in whatever things he is doing and he expects us- his children to live by principles more than not he expects us to plan our life well.
When it comes to ministry and family we need to have a proper plan so that none of them will suffer in our hands. A human being that knows that he or she is going into a ministry and at the same time going to have a family needs to have been planning.
There's a popular saying which says you don't learn how to fight at the battleground if not, you are finished! Ministry and family are important but some come with high priorities.
**Life is good**
Re: MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Obajichi(f) .:. Tue, 29 Nov, 2022 - 10:53:34:am GMT
The truth is that every family is a ministry on its own first before the general ministry of a thing.
The devil knows this and that's why he fights tooth and nail to ensure that christians don't last in marriages.
A complete home is a threat to the devil.
If a parent fails in the home ministry, he / she has planned to fail in the christian ministry.
Let parents learn to do the needful in the home. In fact, use the home ministry to test rum the church ministry, learn from how you can handle things in the family before you go on to the larger stage of God's work.
**I love being me.**
Re: MINISTRY AND FAMILY by: Oluwatomisin(f) .:. Tue, 28 Feb, 2023 - 03:46:37:pm GMT
Ministry and family are important in the life of every human being but despite their importance, there are levels to them. As a human being, you are to function well in your family, and your purpose on earth is also called ministry.
We all know that the purpose of God is very important because that's what we are called to do but yet God that ordains marriage has a plan for us and every process requires proper plans. Planning is something that should be done at every point of our life because without that we can lose track.
Ministry does not necessarily start from outside instead it starts from home so that is why your family is the priority before ministry. When your family is well-grounded then your ministry will thrive so take note of your family.
**Always put God first **