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Lending » In a deep mess. by: Kenny11973(m) .:. Mon, 10 Nov, 2014 - 02:58:05:am GMT
It was some in Feb these year, my parent kept some money with which I save in the bank. Anytime I needed money I will withdraw out of the money and return it back. As time goes on, a friend of my have issues with bank he took a loan from and my friend walk to me and if I can him a favor by borrowing him out of the money. The question I ask him is how will you pay the mony back,he told me he's doing contribution that involves 10people and is turn is to take money at the 7th month which is the following week. I agree to give him, but story changed when the time for the collection,the people involved are not ready to pay the money that month and was postpone to the 8th which I still chill for. well, the 8th month is around the money given to my friend was half which he did not given me because is not complete that I should which I agreed. Now the funny thing is that my parent are asking for the money if is still with me. What do I do,my friend is not ready to pay the money because he do not have any penny with him likewise me . Please advice me on what to tell my parent
**kenny g**

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Re: In a deep mess. by: Obinnaoguji(m) .:. Sat, 06 Jul, 2019 - 03:42:46:pm GMT

You learnt your lessons already. I think what you will do is continue to talk to your friend concerning the money. Be sincere with your mum about the whereabouts of the money. She deserves to know.


While you have done these, try to work towards repaying the money yourself. When your mum sees your sincerity in the whole situation she may want to pardon your mistake and give your friend more space to pay back.

Mothers generally have good heart towards their children, especially in their children's sincerity. In case she insist that the money be paid back by you or your friend, work towards paying back the money. 

**Obinna Oguji**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Oluwaseyeini93(f) .:. Fri, 11 Sep, 2020 - 10:07:02:am GMT

Tell them the truth, nothing but the whole truth with all sincerity and apologies. 


Thank God the money is for your parent. But what if someone also kept the money with them, you can't imagine the level of embarassment they will go through because of your empathy. 

Integrity is key when dealing with money. So as not to loose your trustworthiness, look for means of returning the money...

**Blessed be God who has blessed us with all Spiritual Blessings**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Holashayo(f) .:. Fri, 11 Sep, 2020 - 01:49:23:pm GMT

Wow! What a friend indeed.
You did what you ought to have done as a good friend, you helped him but he disappointed you.
You have nothing to do than to press him the more since the money is for your parents and you won't want to tell stories to them. They won't even believe you if you talk them the truth.
You just have to keep disturbing the guy, and if he refuse to turn up, you will have to face your parents and make them understand. They are your parents, they cannot kill you no matter what.
That will also be a lesson to you.


**Damiswag**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Kennybabz(m) .:. Mon, 21 Sep, 2020 - 06:56:50:am GMT

This is the reason I hate lending people money because to return the money back will surely be a problem. I will rather introduce them to borrowing app where they can borrow and pay back later because of all thesd stories. 

To pay back load hard some people. I will rather give what I can give than to borrow out.

May God help us.

**Kehinde**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Francis(m) .:. Mon, 21 Sep, 2020 - 10:26:35:am GMT

Hmm, this case is frustrating sometimes.
Have also experience the same thing before. Why is it that if we fail to render the assistance, people will say we are wicked, if we do, they will take us for granted.
I don't still know which song to sing to this beat.
Well people will surely be people.
That your case have pass what you can handle yourself. There is no how you will not tell your parents about it, after all you did not spend it irreasonably. 
Put your mind in one place, they are your parents, talk to them.
Am sure God Will you bro. Take heart.

**Francis**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Krainaix(m) .:. Sat, 21 Nov, 2020 - 06:58:38:am GMT

You just have to tell the truth be sincere to your parents about the whereabouts of the money because the longer you keep it hidden from the more worse it gets..
**Krainaix**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Abiodun(m) .:. Sat, 21 Nov, 2020 - 11:24:40:am GMT

in a deep mess. if it's something is deep. it extends a long way down from the ground or from the top surface of something. A deep container. such as a cupboard. extends or measure a long distance from front to back. you use deep to talk or ask about how much something measure from the surface to the bottom. or from front to back. deep in an area means a long way inside it. if you say that thing or people are two. three or fourdeep. you mean that they are two three or four rows or layers of them there. you use deep to emphasise the seriousness. strength. important. or degree of something. if you experience or feel something deep inside you or deep down. you feel it every strongly even though you do not necessarily show it. if you are in a deep sleep. you are sleeping peacefully and it is difficult to wake you.
****


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Abbie@21(f) .:. Sat, 21 Nov, 2020 - 01:03:36:pm GMT

  From what you've just said and done, it shows you are a very kind hearted person, but that doesn't mean you should just stay cool and quiet, your friend might have seen that quality in you and taken advantage of that, he may have the money or he may not, your friend came to meet you because he trusted you or he just wants to take advantage of you, see how he acts be wise, maybe you should still give him some time and since the money is your parent's they may go mad at what you have just done , but my dear there shouldn't be any cause for alarm.


  Your friend gave you a fixed date for which he was going to return back your money but didn't, you have learnt something from this experience that humans are full of dissapointments..., don't ever do something as risky as that again

**Abbie **


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Chamak(f) .:. Sat, 21 Nov, 2020 - 08:00:32:pm GMT

This is no new scenario so I don't see the reason for the panic. Though your parents will be really mad at you because you were given a clear cut instruction on what the money is meant for and you went and do your own. You should have calculated the risk involved before allowing sympathy to put you in the mess that you're in now. 


Right now the best thing to do is tell your parents and whatever comes out of it, you should accept it like that. At least you have learnt your lessons now and next time when you're faced with a decision like this, you should know the best decision to take.

If you were working now it would have been something that you'll just decide to pay your parents back with ease or just simply replace the money but you're not so please don't make this same mistake again because it's a very delicate one. It's just that in this case it's your own parents that is involved because if it were to be another friend that put the money in your account, you might probably be in jail by now.

**chamak collections**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Flat(m) .:. Mon, 23 Nov, 2020 - 04:28:57:pm GMT

Hmmm! It is truly a deep mess. A lot of times we get ourselves into problems just because we want to help people and this does not only affect us but also affect those closer to us at the same time. It is good to help, it is good to assist, it is good to be assisting people but it is important that we also note it that all must be within our capacity. For every help that we render we must ensure that we are not using it to affect others. This have happened to me a lot of times and have learnt my lesson the hard way. 
From this scenario, I can see that your friend does not have the ability to pay back the money not that he doesn’t want to pay out of willingness. This is part of some of the challenges that is attached to lending, most especially when it deals with a close friend relationship, there is limitation to the way one can began to request for the money just to prevent the friendship alongside. But I think one thing you can do is to force your friend to pressurise those he is doing the contributions with, he should make sure that he pressurised them enough. Sincerely, this is one of the reasons why I have issue with all those thrift people. The thing did not crash when it is not yet his turn but got crashed when it is time for him to collect, I think they just planned against your friend.
So, my dear brother, you can go ahead to inform your parent about the money, most importantly if the money is not what you can easily raise yourself. I will even advise you allow your friend appear before your parent, let him use his mouth to explain himself. All you just have to do is to just keep on raising the money silently if he is unable to pay at the end of the day. 


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Flat(m) .:. Mon, 23 Nov, 2020 - 04:31:48:pm GMT

Hmmm! It is truly a deep mess. A lot of times we get ourselves into problems just because we want to help people and this does not only affect us but also affect those closer to us at the same time. It is good to help, it is good to assist, it is good to be assisting people but it is important that we also note it that all must be within our capacity. For every help that we render we must ensure that we are not using it to affect others. This have happened to me a lot of times and have learnt my lesson the hard way. 
From this scenario, I can see that your friend does not have the ability to pay back the money not that he doesn’t want to pay out of willingness. This is part of some of the challenges that is attached to lending, most especially when it deals with a close friend relationship, there is limitation to the way one can began to request for the money just to prevent the friendship alongside. But I think one thing you can do is to force your friend to pressurise those he is doing the contributions with, he should make sure that he pressurised them enough. Sincerely, this is one of the reasons why I have issue with all those thrift people. The thing did not crash when it is not yet his turn but got crashed when it is time for him to collect, I think they just planned against your friend.
So, my dear brother, you can go ahead to inform your parent about the money, most importantly if the money is not what you can easily raise yourself. I will even advise you allow your friend appear before your parent, let him use his mouth to explain himself. All you just have to do is to just keep on raising the money silently if he is unable to pay at the end of the day. 


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Chiboy(m) .:. Mon, 23 Nov, 2020 - 05:32:00:pm GMT

You have done well, is not everyone that have the good heart to help a friend, the reason for friendship is to be there when things are rough.

Things don't always work out the way we plan them, for your friend his plan was to pay you with the money his to get from the contribution, which didn't work out the way he planned it. I will advice you still give more time to your friend to come up with the money, just be sure he is making effort to repay the debt.
Since your parent are asking for the money, it will be better if you tell them about it, be honest with them, tell them exactly how it happened and I believe they we definitely understand you. But if they refuse to insert then you have to make plans with your friends on how to pay the money.
Make sure you don't fight with your friends because of the money, especially when he his making effort to repay his debt.

**Chiboy**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Wonders(f) .:. Thu, 07 Jan, 2021 - 12:37:16:am GMT

This is so sad and I really feel bad for you.i don't know what I would have done if I were to be in your shoes.I would have been so devastated.am really sorry about this.

Right now I want to speak to the borrower,Mr man am sure you have learned your lessons now.you know my pastor do says that "so because you feel getting Iphone is the next thing,you went and borrow money to get Iphone thinking by the time you call all your relatives that you need phone,the money will come out and you will pay back.that is pure foolishness"and I agree to it because so many things can happen,you just never can tell.
You don't borrow money to get junks and for stupid reasons,it isn't proper!if you really have to borrow money,you need to have a bulletproof plan on how you will pay back even the bible says a borrower is a slave to the lender,so why making yourself a slave just because of money,it just doesn't make sense.
Apart from the fact that you become a slave,when you borrow money,you can't sleep well again I mean there is no how you can do it,you will keep thinking about how to pay back the money and that is how you are a slave.Your joy and peace automatically reduces!there is no how you can try and get happiness,your joy can't be full.The only time it will be full is when you have cleared your debt.
And if we are to look carefully,money matters is a highly sensitive one and risky too.
We should really be careful,money borrowing isn't the best at all.

**Wonders**


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Re: In a deep mess. by: Samuel23(m) .:. Sun, 27 Jun, 2021 - 09:46:49:pm GMT

There's a Mercy after saying the truth
Let them know the truth that you lead your friend the morning
Their reaction we determine what to do

**Olasunkanmi**


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