Romance » IF YOUR SPOUSE COMPLAINS ABOUT EVERYTHING. THEN YOU NEED THIS... by: Gooddypye(f) .:. Mon, 29 Apr, 2019 - 05:10:01:pm GMT

We don't like it when spouses keep repeating things. We believe if it has happened in the past then it should remain in the past but to some, it just feels like that past can never go away. They cannot help it and must always make reference to things.

"That's how you did the same thing in 1997.."

I know how frustrating this can be. I mean, a spouse should be able to overlook things and not have to complain about every single thing.

But see, it's a 2 way thing.

It is equally as frustrating for a spouse to have to repeat the same thing over and over again. Take the example of a husband always throwing boxers and socks on the room floor which the wife does not like. It would be expected that it should stop after a few reminders. This is the point people are told to just do what needs to be done (i.e. if he throws it on the floor then you keep picking it) but then you wonder why these items cannot just be put in the right place in the first place.

When we talk about spouses complaining about everything, we also should talk about why we keep doing everything.

Tolerance is key but balance is important.


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Re: IF YOUR SPOUSE COMPLAINS ABOUT EVERYTHING. THEN YOU NEED THIS... by: Oma_maron(m) .:. Wed, 01 May, 2019 - 11:20:46:am GMT

I had this issue with my partner. Women are always fond of laying complains. This is one thing she does so much. Always complaining.

She keeps things of the past, some she had said before or the ones she hasn't and will wait till when you offend her so much, she then bring it up.

This at times got me frustrated.

But think of this, if your partner is always complaining,

Don't you think there was a reason for her complain?

Don't you think you keep repeating same thing she talks about?

You should learn to balance yourself. Take time bro meditate on her complains. Balance it. Stop saying, she complains too much.

Check yourself. And make amendments.

**Graced **

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Re: IF YOUR SPOUSE COMPLAINS ABOUT EVERYTHING. THEN YOU NEED THIS... by: Velisa(f) .:. Thu, 02 May, 2019 - 09:52:06:pm GMT

You mustn't try to correct your partner over everything.

One of the fastest relationship and marriage killer is trying to point out every little thing your partner is not doing right.

One of the worse evil you can ever do to your partner is to take away their freedom of self expression. The worse emotional position to push your partner into is that place where he or she starts becoming overly conscious of the things they do or say when you are around, because you are a fault picker.

I know you are a perfectionist, I know you like to meet your cup of tea exactly where you left it, but don't take away the power to let your partner be his or herself by correcting everything.

Allow room for mistakes.

Some ladies cannot join a conversation when they're in the same room with their man. Cause the moment they are alone he will start pointing out all the things she said wrong, things she shouldn't have said and how she embarrassed him in public. Don't take away the power to be herself anywhere and any Time.

Don't pick on her shoes all the time, the last thing you want in that relationship or marriage is for her to get to that emotional point where she starts feeling like nothing she does is good for you. You will destroy her by pick pointing her mistakes all the time. Give room for errors, it's all a part of the love experience. Don't complain about the way she styles her hair, don't comment on her heavy foundation all the time, sometimes ignore the witchy eyebrow, where you want her to be is a place where she feels good about herself, not that horrible place where she doesn't feel good enough for you.

I am talking to you ladies too, this goes both ways. You must learn to ignore certain things he does, don't pick on his mistakes all the time. Talk about it once, then let it slide for a long time before bringing it up again.

Listen to me, when your man gets used to your nagging and complaining all the time, the relationship is as good as over.


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Re: IF YOUR SPOUSE COMPLAINS ABOUT EVERYTHING. THEN YOU NEED THIS... by: Piwizo(m) .:. Tue, 28 May, 2019 - 07:35:09:am GMT

For me i feel that the past is not so relevant in a relationship especially something negative that happened in the past because it is already done and we cannot change the past but only the present and that's what will determine the future of our relationship, and any mistake done in the past shouldn't be used as a focal point when you are correcting your partner on something, it just mean you didn't forgive him or her for the previous mistake they might have made.

Having said that, it is also the duty of the person who made the mistake, maybe cheating or for example if my girlfriend speaks to my mom in an unruly manner, it is now left for her to stop cheating on me, and change the way she speaks to my mum because i can say i have forgiven her for her previous mistakes but if i don't see change it might prompt me to continue criticizing her or even end the relationship.

When someone makes a mistake as bad as that and the person is not willing to take correction, do you advise that one continue in the relationship, or if for example a guy always beat his girlfriend or wife should she still continue in the relationship? i don't think so. There are somethings that shouldn't necessarily happen in a relationship, especially if you have stayed with the person for a period of time, you must have understand somethings from the person, and you will not want to do what hurt your partner consciously or unconsciously.

I agree with you that it is a two way thing, but my emphasis is every relationship you have to be organized because people are watching you especially if you have got kids, and they are picking trends from you, if you always complain and nag in your relationship, there is every possibility that when your kids needs something from you as a parent what they will result into doing is nagging.

If you aren't organized and leave the home in a total mess, your kids too will leave the home in total mess, if you speak to each other at the top of your voices and disrespect one another, your kids will disrespect you because that is the language you understand, so we need to be wise by letting our relationship work and being the best it could be.


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Re: IF YOUR SPOUSE COMPLAINS ABOUT EVERYTHING. THEN YOU NEED THIS... by: Fellybabe(f) .:. Wed, 19 Jun, 2019 - 11:29:23:pm GMT

Yes, if your spouse is complaining about everything, then you should also check yourself and make amendments in what ever way it's needed.

Your spouse can not always be nagging like a mad dog with no reason, it's impossible.

You should stop repeating those things that your spouse keeps reminding you of.

But though, their are some people that lacks the spirit of forgiveness and forgetfulness. They may tell you, you ate forgiven but they still have that thong in mind. Any day, you pick a quarrel with them, they will remind you of that thing.

Such people are hard to change. Cause that's their way of life. And it wil take you to convince them before they believe you would t repeat that habit that they never seems to forget.

**God's light**

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