Babe-Fishing/Dating » HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Gooddypye(f) .:. Tue, 30 Apr, 2019 - 03:00:22:pm GMT

Stay away from undefined relationships, a person who truly cares about you will define what it is you are being asked to be a part of.

You are a person deserving of care, attention, dedication and commitment. That involves asking you to be a part of the journey. But how can you be a part of the journey when you have been repeatedly refused definition of the journey?

What are we doing?
Where are we leading to?
How long will this take?
What role do I play?
What are the backup plans?

These are questions that should have been given answers to, when asked by you.

You do not want to wake up in 5 years time wondering why you spent the last 5 years in a relationship that was never a relationship.

What gets defined gets measured, Peter Drucker said but if this relationship cannot be defined, how can it be measured, let alone achieved? Why should you stay in it?

It will be scary to think about moving on after having committed. You may look back and feel all you need is just one more year, but that won't count because a person who never involved you in a journey enough for you to know, or respect you enough to explain it to you, never really loved you like you truly deserve.

Have your relationship defined today. It doesn't need to be achieved today but know what you are into.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Piwizo(m) .:. Tue, 30 Apr, 2019 - 08:48:03:pm GMT

A relationship that has no goals and no plans which you are working towards, is not a defined relationship.

A relationship whereby all you do when you meet is have sex, then it's not defined.

A relationship in which you don't know why you are into it. Then it isn't defined.

It takes a serious partner to get a defined relationship.

It can't be really easy to achieve that. But you must have a goal for your relationship.

To avoid heartbreak, you must learn to identify a relationship that won't last or a relationship that isn't trustworthy.

And once you define that you are in a undefined relationship. I will advice you leave.

A relationship should have goals. You both should be able to sit and make decisions towards the future even if you don't have much at hand.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Fellybabe(f) .:. Sun, 09 Jun, 2019 - 06:48:50:am GMT

A defined relationship at times end up breaking.

Yeah! You both made plans, you decide when you are getting married.

You already made plans of everything about your future down but break up still comes and take over.

Am not saying having a defined relationship is wrong but I just want you to know that it is not a guarantee to marriage.

In fact, the more trust you put in that relationship the greater your pains when you break up.

After you've made so much plans of when to marry. You already trust your partner with everything. And there is a break up, it will affect you seriously.

Many defined relationship don't even work well at the end. Some guys will deceive the lady just so she can be so committed to him and making her see the relationship as the right and defined one.

But future tells at the end.

**God's light**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Velisa(f) .:. Sun, 09 Jun, 2019 - 05:25:11:pm GMT

Most relationships at times are very hard to define.

You don't even know where the relationship is heading to.

You both as partner doesn't discuss anything.

You make no plans together.

You don't care to talk about each others career.

You don't care to talk about each others plan.

All you do every time is either having sex or quarrelling.

Such relationship can not last and will never have a good end.

You've being in a relationship with a guy for seven years, yet no plans of marriage, no plans of anything. All you do is have sex day and night.

You even sextant couples who are married.

It's absolutely absurd.

Let your relationship have a meaning.

Guys, if you are keeping a lady, you've loved to marry but changed your mind because you don't like her attitudes. And you know already that you can not marry her. Tell her the truth and let her go.

Stop destroying the future of innocent girls.

Stop wasting their precious time. Ladies get old quickly than men. And they are very weak vessels.

If you can't define your relationship with that girl, then let her go.

If you can't define your relationship with that guy, then let him go.

If it looks like you are in a relationship that looks like just mere friends relationship, then you should know there is something wrong there.

Let it be shown that you are in a relationship not a friend stuff.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Confidant(f) .:. Tue, 09 Jul, 2019 - 06:10:01:pm GMT

Many people believe a man is never complete until he finds a wife, the supposed missing rib and just as there is the right missing rib, there is also a fake or wrong "missing rib". If you are unfortunate to find the fake "missing rib" you are doomed or finished not complete.

Being in a wrong relationship is not just stressful, it makes your heart tired and your soul worn out. No matter how much effort you put in or how good you try to be, it still seems whatever you give is not enough to keep the relationship. You get hurt, you worry and are sad. Such relationships leave your mind with questions such as

"why is relationship so difficult or complicated, why can't I just be happy in relationship".

Happiness in relationship is not too much to ask, loving without worry is not expensive. In fact, everyone deserves to be happy and have peace of mind. This is not something impossible, but that is not possible when you settle down with the wrong person.

Relationship is not complicated, it is so simple and if you choose to be in one, all you need is to be honest and loyal. You suffer when you settle with someone who is not honest or loyal.

Be with someone who is the same privately, publically and personally. Don't be with someone who is comfortable holding you in private but ashamed of holding you in public. Don't just believe people who only say they love you, believe it when they show that they love you.

Don't let him show you to his family whilst he has other women in his life he doesn't want to let go. Don't let her introduce you to her pastor when she has Exes she can't live a day without talking to.

Don't go looking for a perfect relationship, look for a loyal one a person who will stay with you until the end of your journey in life someone who will stand together with you in difficult times. Be with someone who wants to see you happy even if they are not part of your happiness.

Someone who won't betray your friendship for anything, someone who is afraid of losing you. Be with someone who protects you. Someone who does the little gestures that show you are important and are happy having you in their life. Gestures like "I miss you" text messages in the middle of the day, in your busy schedules, Being the first person they want to talk to when something exciting happens during the day the random call just to hear your voice.

Don't be with someone who lies to you, for you are not a kid. Nobody needs to tell you lies to keep smiles on your face. Be with someone who speaks the truth.
Be with someone who will fight for you if the one you are dating is the opposite of the one I have spoken of in this message, then maybe it's time to call it quits. Don't waste your life with time wasters, for time is one of the most expensive commodities in life. It is more costly than money. You can always regain lost money but not lost time.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Tony4mega(m) .:. Thu, 03 Oct, 2019 - 02:41:45:pm GMT

Love is quite different from lost, the first should not be mistaken for the second in a relationship when this is taken or noted in a relationship it will serve as a compass that will help guide them make decision in thier relationship but when this which is the foundatiom is not noted before dating thr relationship stand a great chance of crashing that is it will not stand the test of time at all.

**Let love lead**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Dynameak(f) .:. Tue, 19 May, 2020 - 09:25:53:pm GMT

A thing without definition is useless and more to it is a commitment that doesn't have a guide. To define a relationship is simply to make known what the relationship is about and to the immediate environment what it stands for.

Any relationship that doesn't get a definition from the beginning is opened to breaking off at some point either from disorganized priorities from parties involved or individual excesses which has more to do with characteristics. To define a relationship gives it meaning and such definition serves as a navigator for the relationship. A lot of abusive relationships were founded on a weak ground which clearly kicked off from a lack of definition to why the relationship is in existence.

Supposedly, in a mentor-mentee relationship if the Mentee doesn't make his/her intention known to the supposed mentor about the desire to be mentored in an area then such relationship is baseless because it lacks definition. Also, if a random guy pops lovely lines in admiration of your appearance and being a lady moved by what you hear smile in response to such commentary but didn't take out time to talk what's happening between you and the guy but in your head you already have a love relationship image magnifying itself ushhhhh you are already in an undefined relationship and that's so unhealthy. Not just the female gender is victim of undefined relationships, the male gender fall victim too. For instance, a man might feel because he gives a young lady gifts that he authomatically is in a love relationship with her but the lady doesn't feel a thing for him.

The most important thing to do when you meet someone is to define what's up between the both of you so as to avoid stories that touch the heart because assumption is a big time killer.

**Life is a race but with God's element of grace it'll be worth while to explore His goodness. **

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Flat(m) .:. Mon, 15 Jun, 2020 - 03:50:28:am GMT

Have a Defined Relationship
Existing in life without understanding the direction in which one's life is moving is just like running a race without an end point. As individuals, we really need to define where our life is going to because it is a life that is well defined that can have a defined relationship. Can imagine an aimless man having a relationship with a woman that has aim or vice-versa, the end point of that relationship will be destruction because of the fact that both does not have aim but rather it is one sided.
Most relationship sometimes are assumed relationship. For instance, I think he is in love with me because of the way he do look at me or I think he has interest in me because he do give me attention whenever I have problems that I want to share with him, etc., it continues like that. A lot of people have fall into this pit of undefined relationship and by doing so, they have wasted a lot of time in their fantasy.
In having a defined relationship it requires one to be sure of some certain questions with at least 99% certainty. This will help one know if one should move on or cut it off. The questions are:
&bullre"> What are we doing: This question although might seems to be funny is very important. It is important for both parties to know the kind of relationship that they are into. So, they need to ask each other if it just a friendship relationship or a relationship leading to marriage.
&bullre"> How are we doing it: This is the next line of action after which both parties understand clearly the kind of relationship they are into. So, it is pertinent for them to think of how to go about and this will be done by them planning.
&bullre"> Planning: The act of failing to plan will result in planning to fail. Since this is a well defined relationship, it is required of them to carefully and strategically plan the future fro themselves. Planning is very important in all the facet of the relationship.
&bullre"> Division of labour: You might be surprised that what is this doing in this place. When both parties understand that they have different works to do they won't be watching overs one another leaving what they ought to do undone. It's sad when you see your fiancée trying to go through your phone looking for what has not been kept there for her. So, understand the fact that you have different abilities and you work according to that.
&bullre"> Comparison: The is one of the most dangerous thing to avoid when defining a relationship. There is a uniqueness in every relationship, so get the one for your own relationship. The fact that it works for TY does not mean it will work for you. This is because different people are in the relationship.
Therefore, in absolute terms, never get involved if the other party is not ready to let you define the relationship. Do not waste your time in an undefined relationship, be quick and calm to know where you are and your position in that relationship. So that you won'tbe seeing yourself as a wife while he sees you as a sister or vice versa.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Blackie(f) .:. Mon, 15 Jun, 2020 - 10:44:00:pm GMT

Having a defined relationship is very important. You need to know the reason why you are dating. Ask yourself why you're dating. Dating isn't just a fun stuff, it's a like a stage before marriage.

Know why you're dating
Understand your partner perspectives about dating. Don't just date because the guy is handsome or because the girl is beautiful, date because you want something beautiful to come out of your relationship, it's that simple. Dating isn't a call of duty game, it's something more than that. Once you understand this then you'll definitely have a defined relationship.


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Flochords(f) .:. Wed, 17 Jun, 2020 - 01:24:04:pm GMT

Definition of relationship is very important in other to have a balanced life. Like and adage that says that " If the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable". If the purpose of your relationship is not known, abuse is actually inevitable. In other to define your relationship with a person, you will need to ask certain questions such as "WHAT ARE WE TO EACH OTHER?" because this will make you know if the person is seeing you in the same light to which to which you are seeing the person. You might be thinking you are the girlfriend/boyfriend of that person and the person might just be seeing a normal friend, so when the person now finally introduces his/her fiancée to you, you become angry and start hurling insult and curses on the person, and the person starts wondering what he/she must have done to deserve such, this can only happen because the relationship is not defined. When someone starts coming close in an un-usual way and you start assuming about your relationship with that person, don't hesistate to ask the person what his/her intentions are. Also learn to ask this question "WHY DID YOU COME CLOSE TO ME?" This question will make the person speak out his/her intentions for coming close to you. Also learn to ask "WHERE ARE WE HEADING TO?" In the case of love relationship. Because some people can come to ask you without the intentions of marriage and that is nothing but a" WASTE OF TIME" because during this time, you are shielded from other reasonable men that will have the intentions to marry you and due to that your time is wasted and time wasted cannot be regained. Make sure you ask your boyfriend or girlfriend their intentions now even though you have not done that before, so you can know where your relationship with him/her is actually heading to.
Not defining your relationship also mean that you have no direction and destination, you are heading towards NOTHING because you actually don't have a particular place you are heading too. Definition of relationship helps you to have a direction and destination because you where you are going and how and when you want to get there. Stop assuming, be certain about it. A defined relationship has clarity of roles, clarity of expectations and clarity of destination. When you are in a defined relationship. The 2 of you involved will know the roles you have to play and what you expect from each other, that will also prevent unnecessary hurts due to unmet expectations due to undefined relationship. Defined relationship put a sense of responsibility and obligation on both on the parties involved in it. Defined relationship is a healthy relationship because it is not based on assumption but on certainty. Defined relationship even gives peace of mind because you just know what you are doing and you are happy about it. Relationship is sweet, it is sweeter when it is defined. SAY NO TO UNDEFINED RELATIONSHIP, IT DOESN'T ALWAYS END WELL. If people can even imbibe this, there will be a decrease in the rate of heartbreaks in this present time.
Have you defined your relationship?. If you haven't, please do that to avoid stories that touches the heart (heart breaks). Have you been through heartbreaks before due to undefined relationship?, Take heed, don't fall into the same trap again, always define your relationship. Don't go close without an accurate definition of who you are that person and what that person is to you, don't give unnecessary attention to people that are not heading to the same place with you. Relationship can either make or mar you. DEFINE IT!

**christ's own**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Flochords(f) .:. Fri, 31 Jul, 2020 - 10:06:50:pm GMT

Many people are in total state of confusion all because of the undefined relationships that they have put themselves in. Some people don't know if they are in a relationship or in a friendship, they are just going as the relationship goes, they are not sure of who exactly and the position they occupy in the life of that particular person but they keep guessing of which guess work is not accurate work. It is very good to have a defined relationship with people around us because it practically goes a very long way in giving us peace of mind and accuracy with precision.
When a person starts coming too close to you, it is good that you ask the person what he or she really wants from you "Friendship or relationship"? and that way you define it and begin to relate with that person based on the reply of that person so that you can quickly make the person know if you are truly interested in the relationship or not so that the form of relation between you both will be platonic rather than being a lovey-dovey kind of communication.
I have heard of different stories of people that end up having their heart broken due to undefined relationships, whereby to them they feel the other person loves them and want to be in a relationship with them and without asking they keep anticipating that someday the guy will ask them out and some of them wait till eternity because they never get asked out by the guy that they have been anticipating that he will ask them out someday and due to that they become heart broken when they see the person loving another person and being in a relationship with another person at the long run. Have a defined relationship truly and also make sure that you are on the same page to save yourself from heart break and all other complications that can result from undefined relationships. Assumption is not accuracy, so don't assume you are in a love relationship with a person while the person has in mind that you are just a normal friend, it will hinder you from going into a relationship with other people that shows interest because you are anticipating relationship with another person and it can be very dissapointing and heart breaking truly. Definition of a relationship is key to a lasting and enjoyable relationship.

**christ's own**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Abbey(m) .:. Fri, 31 Jul, 2020 - 11:37:13:pm GMT

It is good when someone have a definite relationship.
Some youth go in to a relationship just because of money, no it is not a good idea why will go engaged in to a relationship because of money, OK what will happen if money goes away,
Don't date anyhow find a person who you think it worth your standard , date a person who will change your life for the better , date a person who will gave you a positive advice ,.
If you have a defined relationship thing will work out for good for you because you won't have too many problems , even you will be able to take time away study each other very well, then you pray to it, take Time to study each other,.
This kind of relationship you plan on your future how did you won't your future to be like , to the boys out there Don run after too many girls look for one e who you love and build up your relationships together


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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Nagiano(m) .:. Sat, 01 Aug, 2020 - 12:22:41:am GMT

Defining a relationship is the first step to take from the first day you decided to start it. It is wrong to just jump into relationships without knowing where you are both heading to.

These days many people go into relationships fire the wrong reasons knowing fully well that a relationship that is not defined is a broken one from day one.

Before starting a relationship, you both need to first spell out your expectations. You both need to state what you intend to achieve from the relationship.

If it is sex you want state it. And if it is marriage you want, state it. If you have laid down goals and you need a partner to be able to achieve them, state it.

It is better to be open from the start and pour out your mind, so you'll not end up saying had I know later.

**Man United for Life**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Victoria(f) .:. Sat, 01 Aug, 2020 - 02:10:51:pm GMT

Have a defined relationship. Sometimes I love how people refuse to put labels on their relationships because it usually seems cool and I think "This people must be really chill set of people and they are free to do what they want". The truth is, even people without labels have rules guiding their relationships. Even when the relationship is not defined according to them, it actually is and the best part is that they both understand themselves and the situation they are in perfectly.
The other side is when there are two confused people who don't know what they want from each other and when people who see the whole thing play out ask "What exactly are you guys?" They say "Oh, we're just friends" or "I don't even know" or "We're just living". I'm sorry but what on earth is going on with you guys. You are just friends? Then why do you hang out together all the time and do things that couples do when you're together. If you say you don't know what you are then what exactly do you know? Tell me! It's just like you're toying with both your emotions and that of the other person and it makes absolutely no sense if you ask me. And then for those who say the they're just living and they are moving with the wind. Tell me too, what kind of life you are living actually because I don't think I want to live that type of life. Don't be together today and tomorrow you're just friends. Friendship doesn't work that way and neither does relationship. There should proud be a whole new word used to describe that particular thing you both have got going with each other. It's not just confusing to the two of you, it's highly confusing to the rest of us that have to watch and listen to you. So please, define your relationship.

**Live, love and heal...**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Victoria(f) .:. Sat, 01 Aug, 2020 - 02:11:34:pm GMT

I belong to a group of friends consisting of about seven people as there are some that are usually one leg in one leg out do it is seven give or take. In this group of friends, there is a guy and a girl who apparently like each other and it's something every single person in the group and outside the group knows. We always tease them about it too. The guy has always been trying to ask the girl out, practically almost begging her to be his girlfriend. This girl always keeps on saying no but at the same time keeps on telling the boy that she is into him. According to him, her reply always goes along the line of "I really like you but I'm just not ready for anything right now. You can ask me again soon though. I feel I should have been able to come to terms with the idea by then". That is almost word for word her reply to this poor guy all the time. Even while saying no, she refuses to let go of the guy. When we hang out together as a group in school, she's always making sure to hold his hands while walking, sitting on his laps, hugging him. The guy got tired and gave up but he didn't tell her that. He just stopped asking one day. So another day, when we got back to school after our mid semester break, he introduced a girl to us as his girlfriend. We weren't shocked. Not in the least. We all saw it coming. Well all of us except the girl he liked before. She got really mad at him and demanded why he didn't break up with her before getting another girlfriend. My friend was shocked. He didn't even know they were dating and when he told her that she said that she felt that as long as he knew she liked him, they were together automatically.
Please know yourselves! If you're dating, say you're dating. If you're friends, then stay that way. Let's save ourselves from embarrassments.

**Live, love and heal...**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Lana(f) .:. Thu, 06 Aug, 2020 - 06:47:53:pm GMT

This is very important. Define your relationship. Don't hope someday it will become a relationship or because you have feelings for each other doesn't mean you are dating. Ask questions. Don't be afraid of what you are going to hear or the answers you would get. It is better to get hurt now than to waste your time and energy on someone for years and get extremely hurt. Know where the relationship is headed. If he says let's see how it goes or let's just go with the flow, my sister run. He is not ready. He is just looking for someone to play with and keep him busy. He is bored. If he wants you for real, he would tell you upfront what he wants. Guys always know what they want. So if it is not you they want, find out before giving your all into a colossall waste of time.
**Love yourself...**

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   Re: HAVE A DEFINED RELATIONSHIP by: Mima(f) .:. Thu, 06 Aug, 2020 - 10:09:21:pm GMT

Relationship with someone can either be a lifetime or short time relationship.Your relationship with someone can be in form of Marriage, friendship, business , etc either ways, your relationship with someone should be definite.

No everybody that comes into your life is expected to be your friend, they come sometimes just to play one role or the other in your life. Something I have learnt for sometime now, when someone walk into your life you do not have to open up everything about yourself to them and conclude yourselves as 'besties' especially the ladies . Observe the person, time will reveal whether she is truly a friend or not.You can't hide a seed for too long, it will sprout out in due time.

Do not go into a relationship that are not productive and profitable, friends that depreciate us mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and otherwise. You can know if a relationship i. e friendship is going in a wrong way, not bringing meaning into your life.

Sometimes, people go into a relationship because they see people entering it. Why would you say you want to have a boyfriend because your friends have? Girls, be wise. Do not venture in what you are not prepared for. That is why we hear of broken relationship, divorce, suicide or rape.

Make your relationship status with someone defined. They should know your dos and don'ts.

**Just me**

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