Love-Stories » Don"t Push Her Away by: Oma_maron(m) .:. Sun, 21 Apr, 2019 - 07:16:22:pm GMT

One man once came to me to seek advice. He asked, 'Brother, please what can I do to my son who always brings me shame? He is an arm robber, rapist etc, he insults and fight all the time'. After much interrogations, I found out that the man is a very decent man from a decent lineage. I then suggested for a DNA test to ascertain true biological ownership of the boy. He went for it and the result showed he is not the biological father of the boy.

The DNA test solved the situation, no amount of prayers, fasting or calling on God would had solved it. Only Wisdom from God can save such a situation. If a child is not yours, he can never be yours. At times we men are the genesis of every problems we have in our matrimonial homes. You marry a woman, after 3-4 years, she isnt pregnant for you, you start abusing her, calling her names. You start maltreating her. Your family calls her barren, a witch. They accuse her of eating up the children in her womb. She cries everyday.

Because of you and your family's treatment of her, she did what she wouldn't had done. You pushed her into cheating, into committing adultery. Instead of you standing by her to appreciate her fidelity and faithfulness to you for the past years, you now changed her from good to bad. Before accusing that woman, have you checked yourself? Don't you know you might be the cause of her supposed barrenness? Of her infertility? When a man have low sperm count, even though u sex a woman from Genesis to Revelation, from Jerusalem to Mecca, or u give her monkey in the shadow kind of sex, she wont get pregnant.

If you are impotent, you can never impregnate a woman. Stop acusing her wrongly, check yourself. For a woman to prove her fertility, some of them go out to cheat on you that cheating produced that armed robber you now have. You are the cause of everything dear man. And to women too Some of you are the cause of your problems. Stop abortion now! If that man isn't man enough to father a child, tell him and insist he use a condom.

If you get pregnant, let that boy take up his responsibilities. Stop aborting those babies. Stop destroying your wombs to please any stupid man. One boy was like, ' but me I don't enjoy sex without condom'. And am like, 'if you dont enjoy sex without condom, then also enjoy taking responsibilities of the fruits of sex without condom'.

**Graced **

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Re: Don"t Push Her Away by: Piwizo(m) .:. Thu, 25 Apr, 2019 - 03:18:02:pm GMT

Yesterday I was with a lady... I knew her during my secondary school days. She was one of the most brilliant student then. Seeing her once again was something that filled my joy. But she wasn't really in a good mood when we talk about husbands. Well, I was not married and I knew she was. Her response shocked me when I asked her of her husband and children.

"My marriage has been in hell, when I say hell, I mean real hell."

I paused. That wasn't sounding like a light joke neither was it sounding like a marriage there had being a one time enjoyment. I never wasted time to ask her why?

"I don't know what's going. Ever since I got married to my husband over three years now, each time I'm pregnant he always ask me to abort... Some are usually up to three months pregnancy."

"What?" I screamed and kept my mouth seeking for more questions. "That's crazy!" I exclaimed. But kindly cautioned myself knowing we are actually talking about her husband here, and what she needs right now will be an advice and not just screaming that will bring no fruit. I exhaled and inhaled and further asked why?

"He said he doesn't want any of his child to, he wants to have enough money before giving birth." She ended and after some minutes silence... She looked at me and asked me... "What do I think?"

I was silent for a while.... But I felt I needed to know more before giving any advice. I began some series of question...
"What type of apartment do you live in?" I asked.
"A room and parlour self contain." She replied and that shocked me a bit. A room and parlour self contain not enough to start a living? I asked myself.
Moreover I continued...
Do you know how much he's earning in a month?" I asked further.
"Yeah! He earns eighty thousand naira monthly." She replied again and I inhaled.
"And you, how much do you earn in a month?" I went on...
"Fifty thousand naira." She said.

I never know what to say anymore but just have to ask...
"Is he mentally sick or has any sickness?".
"No! She replied.
Hmm... I kept quiet for a while.
"How many abortions have you made?" I asked.
"Three." She replied.
I don't know what to advice her. I thought of having this discussion further some other time. Whereby I would have thought about this and have a good advice for her.

My point is... Some men are the reasons why women puts on some actions. Like your own part of the story. The pressure from family on the woman at times and even from the man. Once she leaves now, people will say, she lacks patient and all that. But they don't know what she has being passing through.


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Re: Don"t Push Her Away by: Gooddypye(f) .:. Mon, 06 May, 2019 - 08:18:29:am GMT

@piwizo: women are not left...

In all relationships that ended, it is always women complaining that they were left, or the men were on the wrong or men messed it.
My question is, are women always innocent in case of a break up?
No, this is a clear answer.
In some cases, women are the wrong and led to the man leaving them. What I know, women always play victim. They might even push the man to going away so that it will seem like it is the man who left or the man was on the wrong.

Tactics women often use are: -

1. Rationing sex. This is a sure deal breaker. A man who was used to getting constant sex is suddenly denied. Slowly, such a man eventually reaches a breaking point and "cheats" thus giving a woman the perfect excuse to go.

2. Being overly demanding. This literally chocks the man until he feels he is not a man enough for her and simply bails out.

3. Living beyond her means making the man feel useless.

4. Nagging. No man ever wants a nagging woman and this is a sure way to push the man away.

5. Flirting with other men openly and when the man raises an issue he is told, "they are just friends, you are just insecure, you are just too protective, it is just casual friendship, etc." but she knows what she is doing.

6. On the flip side, a woman who knows she has a very high libido might become overly demanding to the man making him feel not a man enough and thus the man literally runs away from her.

7. She begins to dress unattractively so that the man gets pissed and embarrassed to be with her. With time the man begins to notice other more attractive ladies and it is a matter of time before he leaves.

8. She cheats on him, and throws the blame to him e.g. you are never there for me, you do not satisfy me, etc.

9. She begins to compare him with other men often richer men until the man gets tired of her and bails out.

10. If she got married with a child, she begins to get in touch with her baby daddy something which men really hate. Very few men can survive this.

11. She begins to slowly cut off communication and when the man asks why, her reasons are she is busy. When the man pushes further, he is labelled insecure. Within no time, the man is tired and going away. The girl is smiling
But after all these, they often cry foul of being dumped but they engineered the entire process.


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Re: Don"t Push Her Away by: Confidant(f) .:. Fri, 21 Jun, 2019 - 01:42:56:am GMT

There are rare case that happens to women. Though the issue of husband and family abusing and calling the woman names once she couldn't conceive for some years after marriage is common.

People have forgotten that, it is God who gives children and not depending on how the man functions on bed or how the woman's womb is. God is the author of children. He give at his own will.

Though there are some tines, some of this situation are caused by the women themselves. During some of them youth age. They aborted so much pregnancy just to keep holy till they marry, so they won't face shame being pregnant before marriage, so once they are married... They start looking for children.

But nevertheless, as a man, don't push your wife out just because you are married for some few years now and she has not being able to conceive.

You need to show her live and help her out. She never wished to be a barren. No woman will ever wish to be a barren.

At times, the problem is from the husband. But dye to lack of knowledge, he will always blame his wife.

Men, it isn't that innocent woman's fault that he has not been able to conceive. Pray and fast along with her. Seek the face if Hod for mercy. And God will bless and answer you with a child.

When you are in a problem, the best person to call on is God, and not your parents who will harden the case.


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